Funny Baseball Quotes
by: Aron Wallad
A baseball game is simply a nervous breakdown divided into nine innings.
- Earl Wilson
When they start the game, they don't yell, "Work ball." They say, "Play ball."
- Willie Stargell, 1981
When we played softball, I'd steal second base, feel guilty and go back.
- Woody Allen
A baseball park is the one place where a man's wife doesn't mind his getting excited over somebody else's
- Brendan Francis
There have been only two geniuses in the world. Willie Mays and Willie Shakespeare.
- Tallulah Bankhead
Baseball is very big with my people. It figures. It's the only way we can get to shake a bat at a white man
without starting a riot.
- Dick Gregory
What does a mama bear on the pill have in common with the World Series? No cubs.
- Harry Caray
Confucius say: Baseball wrong - man with four balls cannot walk.
- Author Unknown
With the money I'm making, I should be playing two positions.
- Pete Rose, 1977
Andre Dawson has a bruised knee and is listed as day-to-day. Aren't we all?
- Vin Scully
Cricket is baseball on valium.
- Robin Williams
Finish last in your league and they call you Idiot. Finish last in medical school and they call you Doctor.
- Abe Lemons
The doctors x-rayed my head and found nothing.
- Dizzy Dean
I managed a team that was so bad we considered a 2-0 count on the batter a rally.
- Rich Donnelly, minor
Let no one accuse baseball of not being tough on drugs. During his baseball career, Steve Howe was given 7
- Bill Ferraro, baseball fan.
I could never play in New York. The first time I came into a game there, I got into the bullpen car and they
told me to lock the doors.
- Mike Flanagan, Baltimore Orioles
On his own scouting report: "Very deceptive. Slower than he looks.
- Joe Garagiola
A lot of things run through your head when you're going in to relieve in a tight spot. One of them was, 'Should
I spike myself ?
- Lefty Gomez
Three more saves and he ties John the Baptist.
- Hank Greenwald, on Bruce Sutter
About The Author
Aron Wallad has been a baseball lover for over 45 years. His passions have included; playing, watching, reading , evaluating,
and coaching the game he adores. Check out his baseball ezine. For inspiring quotes, unusual statistics and most of all heartwarming
stories go here. If you love baseball you will love his site.